For those of you not paying attention (and why should you, unless you're in the staffing industry or HR?) in 2000 Microsoft paid out millions to settle a lawsuit because they didn't protect themselves from co-employment liability. It was ugly messy.
If you're in HR, staffing, or think your company might run the risk of co-employment issues, then my friend, you should tune into the Aquent webcast Co-Employment: Risks and Rewards.
(Once again, I was barred from titling it, "Co-Employment, Scourge of the DEVIL!" They really don't know what they're missing hiring a Branding genius like myself.)
Moving on, Edward Lenz, who is Sr. VP for Public Affairs and General Counsel for the American Staffing Association and wrote a book on the topic, will " help you gain a better understanding of co-employment, the potential risks, and how you can manage this dynamic to best serve everyone involved."
And keep Satan out of your workplace! (Okay, that's mine.)
If you get the idea that we have close to 100 pumpkins of various shapes and sizes by the time Halloween comes around, give yourself two points.
My memory is very iffy, but I seem to remember my family of 6 going out to a pumpkin lot and having to decide on one pumpkin to bring home. Then I believe my parents took it away from us, argued with each other, carved it, and made pumpkin seeds while we watched It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown downstairs.
It's all a big haze.
But my wife and I do a similar version of carving with my kids: they bring in their 5 pumpkins each, attempt to draw on them, then we carve them up the best we can while they Art Direct ("Make the logo bigger, Dad!", "Has anyone seen this pumpkin's job jacket?")
Which is why this post by a design studio in Queens talking about their Pumpkin Carving Salon intrigued me. They invited "24 of our most creative friends and local artists to our studio and asked them to break the mold on traditional pumpkin carving."
Maybe they'll be available tomorrow night when we start ours.
Otherwise, I'm going to have to teach the kids the proper use of a DeWalt 18-volt power drill.
I bet you, like many people, wonder aloud while reading this blog, "Just how high and whiny is Tim Donnelly's voice?" Or, those of you more familiar with our office, "Just how fast does Susie Hall speak. And how is it she was born and raised in the South and has no trace of an accent?"
All your questions will be answered (and some you don't) courtesy of Jim Stroud.
Jim was kind enough to interview Susie and I for his Recruiters Lounge and make us sound funnier, smarter, and cooler than we are in real life. I think it might be the addition of music in the background.
If you'd like to hear more of what life is like in staffing, what it's like staffing at Aquent, or where we stash our chocolate and loose change, click below.
What, exactly, is an "Aqualung"? What did 80's hair band Poison mean by the "Unskinny Bop"? Can anyone, anywhere, name a Golden Earring hit?
Sometimes Rocktober brings about more questions than answers.
Happily we're bringing you only solutions this week, in the form of fantastic Aquent Talent guaranteed to impact your company's bottom line and make your work life better.
Which will free you up to accomplish important life goals...
Say, getting the Trans-Am off those cinderblocks and out of Mom's yard by Thanksgiving.
You can thank us with a PBR down by the river.
Don't forget to follow the links for profiles, samples, and resumes.
Then call us for our Classic Rock hold music (we won't be long).
Enjoy!
FEATURED TALENT THIS WEEK
Thomas M. - Print & Web Art Director | Designer
Coburn H. - UI Design | Developer
Sokrates F. - Copy Editor | Proofreader
Chris G. - Jr. Flash ActionScriptor
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Thomas M. Print & Web Art Director | Designer
With amazing experience in CPG, entertainment, automotive, beauty, architecture and non-profit, look no further for your next print and Web superstar!
Well, just a little further, we're not done telling you about him.
Tom's conceptual as well as hands-on skill can be seen on work for companies such as National Geographic, NBC, Mazda, Infiniti, Nestle, Ziba Beauty, and many more. He has agency experience from Rare Medium, Sandy Creative, and CRDG Hollywood and is an expert at creating stellar packaging, POP, signage, marketing collateral, direct mail, Web sites, Flash animation banners, and HTML emails.
Looking for a team environment to call home (either permanently or freelance), he'll make all your campaigns truly shine!
Professional Categories: Graphic Design, Art Direction
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Coburn H. UI Design | Developer
Now available after finishing up work for Ignited Minds, Coburn is a gifted Web Designer and Developer who has led creative teams in custom software development, internal- and external-facing sites, ecommerce environments, and much more.
With strong design skills and technical acumen, he's done excellent work of us at NBC Universal, Public Interest Advertising, and Earthlink. While on staff at Venice Consulting his client roster included Hilton Hotels, Buy.com, Fox Sports, Goldsmith Seeds, Shea Homes, Morgan Samuels, Millie & Severson, Pure Link, and Ladera.
His hands-on skills include some seriously strong HTML/DHTML, CSS, Photoshop, PHP, plus JavaScript and ASP.
Speaking of serious, if you're interested, call us today. We know he's not going to be available for long!
Skills: Adobe Acrobat, Adobe ImageReady, Adobe Photoshop, DHTML, HTML, Macromedia Dreamweaver, Macromedia HomeSite, Microsoft IIS, Microsoft Windows, Microsoft Windows NT, Microsoft Word, Visio
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Sokrates F. Copy Editor | Proofreader
A spot-on Copy Editor and Proofreader with over 8 years of experience, Sokrates recently nabbed one of the highest scores we've ever seen on our arduous proofreading assessment.
Fluent in Chicago, AP, and AMA styles, he's guaranteed accuracy and clarity for dozens of elated clients including Microsoft, adidas, Best Buy, Coors, Disney, Ford, Levi's, Northwest Airlines, Bayer, Bristol-Myers Squibb, GlaxoSmithKline, Novartis, and Novo Nordisk.
With a background including advertising, legal and medical communications, public relations, and marketing, we think you'll find his commitment to the written word (whether it be on paper or on the Web) is second to none!
Professional Categories: Editing, Proofreading, Content QA, Proposal Editor, Content Editing
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Chris G. Jr. Flash ActionScriptor
We know he's going to be big.
Chris has just over a year of professional experience under his belt and he's already working on a notable client roster working on projects like full life cycle development of American Film Institute's prestigious (and extensive) 100 Years, 100 Movies site.
We'd also be foolish not to mention his high scores on our rigorous Actionscript assessment.
Ready to start immediately, he has the awesome hands-on skills and potential to get your site(s) to the next level!
I know, not incredibly Rocktober, but we're trying out a new recruiting method at Aquent, and I'm interested to see what you all think of it.
Now, keep in mind this first video is for an internal position, Area Manager for our ever-wacky NYC market.
As a result there is a lot of visual background noise in this video in the form of people dancing, playing ping pong, and making fun of the guy on camera (our East Coast Regional Manager, Randy Ricker).
Whatcha think, will this fly?
And, if you're interested in running our NYC market, write to Randy and tell him you saw it on the blog.
Unlike March, which leaves like a lamb, the month of Rocktober comes in like a lion...
And continues to smash guitars, kick over amplifiers, and pass out in the hotel lobby for a full 31 days!
Here at Aquent this month means switching our hold music to something heavier than Adult Contemporary, long afternoon rides up the coast in the company Firebird (we just painted it Primer Gray), and hosting weekly rock-themed potlucks (i.e., Chicken McNugents and Sympathy for the Devil's Food Cake).
And for you, it means providing the rockingest available Talent every week until the Fat Lady sings.
Which we know you'll love, as he used to be in the band Poison.
Follow the links for profiles, samples, and resumes and please don't forget to...
Kick out the Jams! __________________________________________________
FEATURED TALENT THIS WEEK
April L. - Interactive Designer Edward R. - Copywriter | Communications Manager Kevin C. - Web Producer | Project Manager Heather N. - Marketing Communications Manager | Coordinator __________________________________________________
April L. Interactive Designer
Over 8 years in the interactive field, if you're looking for great sites, go no further than April's client list.
Conversant in English, HTML, XML, ActionScript and an instructor-level's understanding of Flash, she has a Master's Degree in Multimedia and is stellar in fast-paced environments where it was needed yesterday.
April's designed and developed Flash sites, microsites, banners, Flash quizzes and more for the likes of:
Teleflora.com E! Networks Microsoft Disney Nissan Saturn Nintendo Virgin Mobile SonyCanon CompUSA Staples Anheuser-Busch
Don't see your company's name here?
Give us a call and we'll help you get on this noteworthy list!
With 9 years of high profile experience strategically communicating with an audience, Edward values your customer as much as you do!
At Wells Fargo Bank in San Francisco, he managed their Online Customer Service Communications Team and was responsible for producing and sending (in 2 short years) over 3,500 emails to 10 million customers, as well as writing Web site copy, bank scripts, and internal communications for employees.
At Bank of America he edited and assisted in writing material for clients, lines of business, industry partners, and internal Web site; created training materials for sales conferences and seminars; and implemented, wrote, and created standards and guidelines for internal manuals.
Did we mention he's Six Sigma certified as well?
If you need a Content Strategist able to quickly get up to speed on your product then tell the whole world about it, Edward is your guy!
Skills: Copywriting, Public Relations, Content Editing, Content Manager __________________________________________________
Kevin C. Web Producer | Project Manager
A recent relo from San Francisco, Kevin is a phenomenal Aquent Talent you've got to meet!
At Gap for 7 years working on their retail as well as other businesses units (Gap.com, Old Navy, and Banana Republic), Kevin handled full life cycle project management for their sites such as Gap Maternity, Gap Baby, Gap Kids, GAP (PRODUCT) RED, and many others.
One of only 6 Web Producers working for the company, he has extensive experience managing vendor relationships, working with cross-functional teams, and juggling 10+ projects at any given time.
In addition to his strong project management skills, he has SEO, SEM, and has worked with Omniture for the past 2 years.
Add a great personality to boot and availability right now, and we don't know why you're not on the phone with us already!
Heather N. Marketing Communications Manager | Coordinator
A highly motivated Aquent Talent with work on both on-line and off-line campaigns, Heather just ended her role at CAA as Logistics/Events Coordinator handling speaking engagements for their top talent.
Heather was responsible for creating emails for promotional marketing campaigns as well as maintaining the content for their speaker site: writing and updating client biographies, event information, and schedules. She also worked with talent and company/event sponsors to set schedules, locations, site set up, audio-visual needs, vendors, and presentations.
As Marketing & Communications Manager at the non-profit Paperboard Packaging Council, she was responsible for all communications to subscribers and leaders in the CPG industry, which included writing, art directing, and disseminating their marketing materials including newsletters, brochures, one sheets, ads, trade articles, media kits and press releases as well.
A professional and poised communicator able to handle your highest-level projects!
THAT ROCKIN' BIT AT THE END "The Twelve Signs of the Apocalypse"
Satan's Week in Astrology Week of November 11 to November 17, 2007
Aries Hesitation just isn't your style, especially as this week begins. Who was that who cut you off coming into the office parking lot? The stars say it's time to take matters into your own hands and make them pay for their mistakes. How you do it is up to you, but with Mercury in retrograde you might as well try some good old-fashioned tire slashing.
Taurus Your personal challenge as the week begins: be flexible. Start with your body, do a little yoga, then move on to your mind by investigating a new idea and considering myriad possibilities.
If you don't have time for yoga, contemplate stealing from your company. Just looking where extra cash, or the key to the safe, is hidden can give your mind and body quite a workout.
Gemini Embrace your community as the week begins. Those around you challenge your thinking and offer support, and it's a beautiful balance now.
Now, of course, is the perfect time to ask to borrow money. I guarantee none of your friends will ever ask you for it back.
Cancer It's less about being a big spender and more about setting priorities as the week begins. You may want to splurge, on yourself or someone else, but seek other ways to create deeper, more lasting happiness.
Consider a new relationship. True enough, married couples often drift apart. If you've been thinking of someone new, now is the ideal time to start with a flirtatious smile and knowing wink. Just think how happy they'll be to find out you're done with Old So-and-So!
(Don't be surprised if home issues create tension, just bury it and keep thinking about your new romance!)
Leo Make plans to do the things you enjoy. Eliminate situations that are no longer to your advantage. Opportunities for travel and communication are evident.
In other words, quit your job, say goodbye to your family, and head for Venezuela.
Virgo You can elaborate on your creative ideas and get involved in groups that relate to the arts. Your abilities can help you achieve your goals.
Speaking of which, why did you ever stop drinking like you did in college? You were a heck of a lot more artistic then. Can you think of an artist that didn't drink heavily? Neither can I. Like riding a bike, binge drinking is a habit you could pick up again in a snap!
Libra Your diplomatic nature will help you in straightening out unsavory situations. You will impress others with your initiative and ability to accomplish a lot on while short business trips. Hidden matters are likely to surface.
Matters like why your boss is so cheap. Be sure to corner him with your coworkers on one of your business trips and ask for raises for everyone or you'll all walk.
Just think what a hero you'll be when you get back to the office!
Scorpio If you can't trust someone, question the connection. One of your female friends may try to disrupt your day. Stand up for your rights.
What the heck is wrong with her? It's probably her husband/boyfriend. See what you can do to pry them apart and you'll see a world of difference in her attitude toward you!
Sagittarius New partnerships will develop if you join investment groups.
Consider going down to your local Little Italy and looking for fellas named "Lucky" or "Vinny" (it's charming in a way, isn't it?) These guys will make sure you and your investment is well handled!
Capricorn Feeling misunderstood? Sometimes you can't fathom the world and the world can't fathom you. You may have difficulties with foreigners.
Not surprising, really, as many foreigners are suspicious looking. What are they doing here? Why do they act so differently than we do? Maybe it's best to stay at home and skip work for a couple days. Avoid phone calls.
Aquarius The stars say try to unite the family. They also indicate you need an outlet that will not only physically stimulate you but also challenge your intelligence as well.
Try 4 hours of golf 3 times a week or long Friday-afternoon-to-Sunday-night hiking trips alone in the woods. Both of those are very enjoyable and will refresh you to no end.
Of course much of this stimulation will take you away from many of your family obligations.
Que sera sera, I say.
Pisces Jeez, you're a mess. When you were younger did you think you'd turn out so poorly? I certainly hope not.
If you don't want to receive any more of these rock-related newsletters, please reply with the word "remove" in the subject line.
Also, please feel free to reply and give us updates on your contact information or to ask any questions about Aquent's services or quiz us on Great Rock Bands of the late 70's.
And of course, we'd love to hear your feedback or your rendition of ZZ Top's hit "Sleeping Bag".
Monday marks the beginning of ROCKTOBER and you know what that means...
Aquent will BLOWOUT prices on every guitar, amplifier, keyboard, and wah-wah pedal in the stock!!! We refuse to be UNDERSOLD!
Okay, just because Aquent doesn't buy or sell amplified musical instruments, doesn't mean we can't celebrate ROCKTOBER with the best of them.
That's why Aquent will be observing "the holiday" by bringing you plenty of wicked cool Designers, Flash Gurus, Product Managers, Web Producers, and more, More, MORE all month long!
No wah-wah pedals, though.
But come Monday, the chance you'll hear "Dude Looks Like a Lady" on our hold is hovering right near 85%. So be sure to call us!
Follow the links for profiles, samples, and resumes.
Rock on! __________________________________________________
FEATURED TALENT THIS WEEK
Allison M. - Flash Design | Multimedia Artist Caroline C. - Web Producer | HTML Coder Gary G. - Web Producer Matt S. - Jr. Graphic Designer __________________________________________________ Allison M. Flash Design | Multimedia Artist
Just now available after finishing up at one of our clients, Allison is a Flash pro with a solid understanding of front-end Web development.
At Lescher Marketing Group, she created movie ad Flash banners in all shapes and sizes using Flash 8, PointRoll, and a dusting of ActionScript. At Group 22/Beynon, she created Flash interface designs for Honda's interactive application (many modules incorporating video and 3D) that trained their sales force how to sell cars more strategically.
She has many years of freelancing under her belt as well as a wide range of skills and experience in Web, Multimedia and Photography.
When we say she's going to be on her next gig fast, please believe us!
Skills: Macromedia Flash, Macromedia Dreamweaver, Macromedia Fireworks, Macromedia FreeHand, Macromedia UltraDev,Adobe Acrobat, Adobe Illustrator, Adobe InDesign, Adobe Photoshop, Flatbed Scanning, HTML, Microsoft Excel, Microsoft Office, Microsoft PowerPoint, Microsoft Windows, Microsoft Windows NT, Microsoft Word, Outlook Express, QuarkXPress __________________________________________________
Caroline C. Web Producer | HTML Coder
A savvy Producer and Coder with user interface design as well, Caroline just finished up on ABC's high-profile SOAPnet, developing sites like "I Wanna Be A Soap Star", "2007 Daytime Emmys", "The OC", and "One Tree Hill".
At such clients as AOL, IBM, Prentice-Hall, Petersen Publishing, La Agencia de Orci, and Royal Caribbean, she's done everything from designing and programming Web and multimedia sites in HTML, CSS, and JavaScript to managing team of Coders in the creation and management of a multitude of magazine titles.
Working on educational, publishing, and entertainment projects in Paris, New York, and LA since 1995, she's ready to start her next outstanding project!
A recent transplant from New York, Gary's been a Producer at MTV since '03, working on nearly every site under their umbrella.
At the MTVN eCommerce division, he devised business strategy as well as developed and maintained on-line shops for MTV, CMT, VH1, Logo, and Comedy Central. Working with partner Vcommerce, he developed and strategized technologies for sites as well as executing internal and external SEO initiatives.
At MTV World he created and managed content aimed specifically at young multicultural viewers and was responsible for working with broadcast teams to drive traffic to the sites and ensure the effectiveness of on-line strategies.
On top of that, Gary's skilled in hands-on HTML coding, content writing, project management, and is able to strategize and take concepts to market.
Currently available for freelance in the LA area, please don't snooze on this Hot Talent... we know he won't be available for long!
A recent relo to Los Angeles, Matt's a Talent with a book full of smart concepts and clean, yet edgy design.
Most recently at Mad Catz, a worldwide leader in video game accessories, he designed and produced packaging for licensed products for the likes of DC and Marvel Comics, Disney, NFL, and NBA.
At Proteus Design in San Diego, he was responsible in providing solutions for logos, trademarks, letterhead, and other key aspects of identity and branding systems.
Flexible and well skilled in Adobe InDesign, Matt's a standout Aquent Talent ready to make LA his home!
Skills: Adobe Acrobat, Adobe Illustrator, Adobe ImageReady, Adobe InDesign, Adobe Photoshop, Customer Service, HTML, Macromedia Dreamweaver, Macromedia Flash, Microsoft Excel, Microsoft Word __________________________________________________
THAT BIT AT THE END "Murder, LLC"
To: Inmate 6654097 New York State Penitentiary
Hey Uncle Lou,
I got a couple minutes before my next meeting, so wanted to write ya.
I got some time because that stupid Frankie Two Shoes is yappin' at Loretta Stefano in Finance when he shoulda been in my office an hour ago. Just chewing the fat. If he ain't done in five minutes I'm going to rat him out.
Frankie ain't changed. But you know what, Lou? A lot's sure different since you was out here.
Ever since the Family up and went public last year and got itself a Board of Directors, it's like nothing's easy anymore, ya know?
I'll give you a for instance: Say you wanna go out an whack someone. Used to be you'd talk to the Capo and it'd be a done deal. Now you gotta fill out all this paperwork with three copies, then deliver all them to different departments, yadda, yadda, yadda...
You even gotta sign this Body Removal Form before you go out on the hit.
Marone!
Or you want a new highlighter. Fuhgettaboutit. They make you fill out some 41 stroke B slash C form or something, then you gotta get it approved by Mickey Dice up in Operations.
Yeah, that Mickey Dice. In Operations!
And Mickey don't even buy brand name highlighters! He gets those cheap yellow ones that run out in a month.
'Cause of that, now the guys are trying to get ME to take the fall for some money supposed to get laundered at that Chinese take-out place on 5th Street, but ended up in some stupid tax sheltered account. Like it's my fault!
Hey, you don't want goof ups, tell that goomba to buy some decent highlighters.
Everyone's changed around here.
Johnny Blue Eyes is taking some kinda Pilates class and Rocco V.'s tryin' to get everyone to do this office yoga crud. People stopped eating at Nino's down the street 'cause "Italian food's too fatty." Half of our soldiers are on the South Beach Diet!
Even good old Vito Cabrini has started grumbling that I ain't been routing my documents right.
Holy Spumoni, Lou, I helped make his brother and him both!
And the guys are getting sloppy, too. If you got a look at Vinny's outfits on Casual Fridays, you would spit your pasta fazool right outta your mouth.
I ain't even mentioned nothing about Benny (Uptown Benny, not Chicago Benny). The gavone messed up a hit last week because he used the carpool van 'stedda his own car.
I tell ya, they're laughing at us clear across town.
Lou, you know PERSONALLY that I got into this Family for the action, right? Not sit at a desk and file a bunch of stupid reports. And go to meetings. Meetings! We got meetings before meetings. Pre-meetings, they call 'em.
They got us reading books like "Who Moved My Cheese" and "Good to Great". Hey, if we want to go from good to great, all we gotta do is whack the right people.
"Goodfellas to Greatfellas", now THERE'S a book I'd read.
I been eating Pepto Bismol like candy, my stomach's such a mess.
I think being in jail is the probably best thing that coulda happened to ya.
It's making me sick, Lou.
Couple months ago I started thinking about chucking it and turning State's evidence, ya know?
I really did.
But if I up and did, what the heck would they do with my 401(k)?
Talk at ya later,
Cheech
KC/td
Dictated but not read __________________________________________________
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If you don't want to receive any more of these newsletters, please reply with the word "remove" in the subject line.
Also, please feel free to reply to give us updates on your contact information.
And of course, we'd love to hear your feedback! __________________________________________________
Tim Donnelly Propagandist | Blogger | Stuff Coordinator
A Q U E N T 6100 Wilshire Boulevard, Suite 500, Los Angeles, CA 90048 Phone: 323 634 7000 | Fax: 323 954 8517 tdonnelly@aquent.com
We represent more than 400,000 marketing and creative professionals around the globe. Visit aquent.com to learn more.
Speaking of working here, if you know anyone who fits these qualifications, let me know. We're looking for another Agent!
Then YOU could be doing something fun like Diana did this morning:
That is, trying to speak on the company's Fireside Chat to 100 or so people while being distracted by the rest of the team juggling, waving small palm trees, and taking pictures.
Well, it looks like all the quirky staff meetings, weird room names (i.e., The Know, Cognito, Like Flynn), birthday desk demolitions, pumpkin carvings, and group claps at the sound of Debra's cell phone playing the Can Can has finally paid off.
Yes, the Los Angeles Business Journal has named us the Best Small Company to Work for in Los Angeles.
We admit to feeling a little giddy, as rhe Los Angeles Business Journal just declared us the "Best Place to Work" for Los Angeles companies with fewer than 24 staff members.
It's quite an honor. Especially since the judges had yet to hear our Rocktober hold music.
We sure hope you like working with us as much as we like working with us.
But before we get any more Sally Field on you, here are four outstanding, available Aquent Creative and Marketing Talent for your perusal.
Unlike our good state of mind, we can't guarantee the folks will be available for long, so if you're interested, please let us know!
Just follow the links for profiles, samples, and resumes.
Julie M. - Sr. Art Director | Sr. Designer Gerardo L. - Web Developer | Coder Ramon N. - Research Analyst | Strategic Planner Stacey L. - Product Manager __________________________________________________
Julie M. Sr. Art Director | Sr. Designer
A terrific Otis/Parsons educated creative, Julie is an award-winning Aquent Talent with excellent hands-on skills.
On staff at Merle Norman Cosmetics for 7 years, Julie collaborated with Copywriters to concept and develop creative for branding, new product launches, and other promotions. She was responsible for designing in-store collateral, direct mail, advertising, catalogues, POP, packaging, newsletters, and all manner of print and handled everything from casting and directing photoshoots to tracking and maintaining budgets for projects.
As Sr. Designer at Douglas Joseph Partners, she designed a number of stunning, award-winning annual reports and established the in-house design department and managed a team of three while at CareAmerica Health Plans. Most recently she's been freelancing as Sr. Designer at financial services company ING.
With the keen ability to see the big picture and value the needs of the client as a whole, we know you (and your brand) are going to love Julie!
When Gerardo left our office after taking our incredibly comprehensive HTML/CSS/JavaScript assessment, our poor PC was waving a white flag and begging for mercy.
In other words, Gerardo had just set the bar a little higher for Coders.
As primary Web Developer for tradeshow event company Abex Systems, he handled back-end development and front-end coding for up to 12 large e-commerce sites using HTML, CSS, PHP, ASP, ActionScript, and Flash. He's built B2B and B2C sites and has extensive experience with e-commerce sites and on-line shopping carts.
We'd be remiss if we didn't add that he has a terrific personality and would fit in just about anywhere.
We know he's going to move fast, so please give your Agent a call if you're interested!
One of two Research Analysts at La Agencia de Orci and Associates for the last 3 years, Ramon is an expert on market and consumer trends for an array of markets.
Armed with his MBA and a awesome business sense, he has both qualitative and quantitative analysis, strategy and account planning in the advertising and entertainment industries as well as on the research supplier side.
He has experience with focus groups, ethnographies, on-line data sourcing and was THE go-to person for market trends at the agency. With experience working with Zoomerang, Survey Monkey, Scarborough Reports, and SPSS, we're not surprised.
Bilingual in English and Spanish, let Ramon's clear understanding of market dynamics and business opportunities help your market share grow!
Professional Categories: Strategic Planning, Market Research, Data Analytics __________________________________________________
Stacey L. Product Manager
A motivated marketing pro with experience in consumer/trade marketing and sales, Stacey's last 6 years have been focused in Home Entertainment consumer packaged goods marketing at Warner Home Video, Paramount Pictures, Metro Goldwyn Mayer, and 20th Century Fox.
Her comprehensive expertise encompasses global marketing, strategic/business planning, budgeting, new concept/product and brand development, project management, advertising, promotions, online marketing, PR, market research, packaging, POS, merchandising, and relationship building.
With an MBA from Syracuse and exceptional skills in prospecting, profiling, client acquisition, extensive client development, and consultative selling, she's ready to be your brand's biggest fan!
Though many will prattle on (and on) about the uncanny predictions of Nostradamus (Michel de Nostredame), surprisingly few Americans know about the astonishingly more accurate divinations of the late, great Italian oracle Cosa Nostradamus.
Born in the early 20th Century to an exceedingly poor family of piano wire makers in Sicily, Cosa Nostradamus (or "Cosi" as he came to be known) was born with the ability to see the future not only in his hometown of Palermo, but as far away as New York City and Chicago, even a full decade after his death.
Raised by his father, a devout advocate of the "stick-in-hand" method of child rearing, his first prediction was, ironically, his papa's own demise. So exacting was the young Italian's prophecy that he not only foretold his father falling off a cliff while taking a short stroll, but that his dear papa would be yelling out Cosi's name as he repeatedly hit the sides on his way down (a fact two witnesses at the bottom verified).
The poetic, and many times musical, forecasts of the young Sicilian brought rhyme and meter to such tragedies as the brutal bludgeoning of his own language teacher, Roberto Mazarro (who'd consistently gave the young Cosi poor marks) and the accidental decapitation of his long-time persecutor Guido "Four Eyes" Stagnaccio.
Though Cosa Nostradamus could not predict fairly common events such as the gender of an unborn child or the length of a particular drought, he excelled at prophesying exceptional human events such arson, break-ins, drownings, neighborhood shakedowns, and construction delays. As he approached his teen years it seemed nary a murder or unexplained disappearance could take place in Palermo without the young man knowing about it.
If one compares the writings of Nostradamus and Cosa Nostradamus side by side, it soon becomes apparent of the superiority of the latter. Nostradamus' predictions are incredibly convoluted; his "hidden" messages inside quatrains and sixains may be interpreted however the reader would like (as has been done with Nostradamus' "prediction" of the Kennedy assassination). Cosa Nostradaumus' purer, more straightforward language can be neither misunderstood or misinterpreted, even after translating them from their original, and often poorly spelled, Italian.
Consider this prophecy of a fire at the local police station in nearby Trapani:
"Your station will burn To the ground, I say! You'd better hope you Are home asleep With your mothers, Because when the fire starts At 5 in the morning Your station will be nothing but embers!"
Little to be lost in translation there.
As Cosi entered adulthood, word of his incredible powers grew, not only in his native Sicily, but all over Italy as well.
Many Italians came to both worship and fear the impact both he and his predictions would have on their lives. Cosi was given his own column in the national Italian newspaper "Il Manifesto" and became a national celebrity. He was invited to high-level government dinners and asked to chair Italian goodwill associations like Italians for a Cleaner Drug Trade and The Gambino Family Anti-Poverty League.
Though he spent most of his years in his modest fortress in Palermo dispensing predictions to men in fedoras with nicknames like "Knuckles" and "Dapper Don", he never turned down a request for help locating a missing family member, body part, or race horse.
Cosi gained worldwide notoriety with his musical prophecy concerning the rise of Charles "Lucky" Luciano as America's most famous mob boss, a prediction he promptly turned into a hit record with his band "Il Incendiario", which lasted a remarkable 16 weeks on the Italian Hit Parade.
Of his more than 1,546 prophesies, an amazing 95% came to fruition.
Among his more famous "misses" were Joseph "Light Fingers" Genovese defeat in his repeated attempts to become Pope, the continual inability of Italian astronauts to make it out of the local cafe during liftoff, and Benito Mussolini's failure to usher in "a new era of peace."
After a lifetime of public service, Cosa Nostradamus passed away quietly at the age of 84. So quietly, in fact, that it was two full weeks until they found him in one of Palermo's rivers still wearing the cement shoes he'd worn to bed.
A monument outside Cosi's house can still be viewed in Sicily. Featuring a bronze bust of the seer, the plaque on the front features what is said to be his most lasting prediction:
"Try as you might, Try as you will, I swear on my grave You will never locate Jimmy Hoffa!"
Here's the scenario: your laptop is sitting somewhere away from you (say underneath a car seat while you are on the beach in Maui) when it suddenly goes further away from you.
Under someone's arm.
There goes all your secure passwords, saved bank account info, User IDs, credit card numbers, and thousands of meticulously chosen tabs for Mozilla Firefox.
It's that nightmare I keep dreaming of, but really haven't done anything about.
And, wouldn't you know it, the above just happened to someone near and dear to us in our office.
I saw this IronKey Flash Drive the other day and I've been thinking about it ever since. Here's their pitch:
"Instead of creating a "password file" on your computer or using the
same password for everything, have your IronKey store and remember your
passwords... it can securely store your sensitive online identity information,
including usernames, passwords, credit card numbers and addresses."
Essentially, you can use one password for the IronKey and unlock all your passwords.
And what if you lose your IronKey?
Ha! They've thought of that:
"Your passwords are encrypted and backed up to your Online Security
Vault using our state-of-the-art encrypted backup technology.
Synchronize password data between IronKeys, or, if your IronKey is ever
lost or stolen, securely restore all your passwords to a new IronKey.
Only you can access and decrypt your passwords."
Not bad for $79 for a 1GB flash drive, right? But I feel there must be something I'm missing, because that seems kind of cheap.
Regardless, I think I know what I'm getting a special someone for Christmas, Hanukkah, and Kwanzaa.
Why is our Hot Talent Newsletter better than a stay at the hospital?
For one, a typical hospital stay could cost you $29,000 (based on a 2-day stay and 2 follow ups). When you consider that our Newsletter could potentially SAVE you money every time you read it, it might be just enough to make you come to us the next time you need emergency care.
Fortunately every Aquent staff member is qualified to get you the outstanding Marketing and Creative Talent to help reduce headaches, lower blood pressure, and nurse wounded creative and marketing projects back to health.
Like any of the following great Aquent professionals for instance!
Just follow the links for profiles, samples, and resumes.
Enjoy!
(We'd like to remind you that no one on the Aquent staff is a qualified doctor, even if many insist on wearing stethoscopes over their lab coats. If any Aquent employee asks you to disrobe, please contact our Human Resources Department immediately.) __________________________________________________
FEATURED TALENT THIS WEEK
Mallory M. - Graphic Designer Andrew H. - Web Producer | Content Editor Sean H. - Design | Production Kimberly C. - Marketing Communications Pro __________________________________________________
Mallory M. Graphic Designer
Need a Graphic Designer/Senior Production Superstar who can handle anything you (figuratively) throw at her?
Then Mallory is your gal!
Whether it's designing packaging, marketing collateral, environmental displays, newsletters, corporate brochures or dealing with vendors and meeting tight deadlines, it's all in a day's work for Mallory. Able to handle heavy project loads (as many as 15 to 20 design projects simultaneously), she has strong conceptual and hands-on production skills in Quark, Photoshop, and Illustrator.
Ever raising the bar for clients like Martha Stewart, Comedy Central, Discovery Channel, McGraw Hill, and Advanced Bionics, she's requested back time and again when they need a stunning project done right. Right on time and right on budget.
Skills: QuarkXPress, Adobe Photoshop, Microsoft Word, Microsoft Excel, Adobe Illustrator, Adobe GoLive, Macromedia Fireworks, Copy Writing, HTML __________________________________________________
Andrew H. Web Producer | Content Editor
Andrew is an Assistant Producer and Content Editor with over eight years of experience on the Entertainment team at Yahoo!
During his tenure, Andrew was part of the initial production team of Yahoo! Movies editing, processing, and posting a wide range of site content for feature films; creating and editing email-based newsletters and Web pages; researching, managing, and fact checking content; and providing speedy on-the-fly updates for live coverage for mega events like the Academy Awards and Sundance Film Festival. Most recently, he's been writing in New York for entertainment and gaming site UGO.com.
Back in LA and ready for freelance or permanent opportunities, don't let this talented Producer/Editor pass you by!
Skills: HTML, Adobe Photoshop, Macromedia Dreamweaver, Macromedia Flash, Macromedia HomeSite, Lotus Freelance Graphics, Management, Microsoft Excel, Microsoft Office, Microsoft PowerPoint, Microsoft Word, Outlook Express, Real Video __________________________________________________
Sean H. Design | Production
Sean is a multi-talented creative pro who recently became available after running the creative department for AYSO, the American Youth Soccer Organization, for over eight years.
He also happened to nab a perfect score on our Quark assessment and a near perfect one on Photoshop.
Sean has over 15 years experience in print, Web, and multimedia design, as well as video and audio production. With his technical knowledge and hands-on creative talent, he's an outstanding go-between for artists, developers, and management. He's overseen teams of 4+ and his portfolio is chock full of newsletters, illustrations, brochures, logo designs, catalogs, ads, Web sites, and more.
Need a creative with great hands-on skills, nice design sense, and no ego?
Skills: Adobe Acrobat, Adobe Illustrator, Adobe Photoshop, ColdFusion, HTML, Macromedia Dreamweaver, Macromedia Flash, Management, Microsoft Word, QuarkXPress, SQL, Sales __________________________________________________
Kimberly C. Marketing Communications Pro
At Nestle USA for over 8 years, Kimberly worked as Marketing Coordinator under the SVP of Corporate and Brand Affairs, helping manage both external and internal communications of the world's largest food company.
Kimberly's background includes creating press releases, company fact sheets, presentations, and executive bios; developing and managing corporate communications on both the intranet and Internet via a content management system; training and supporting other staff on media management tools; event planning and scheduling; and managing the company's $400K image budget.
Nabbing 4 awards for initiative and spirit during her tenure at Nestle, she's an incredibly motivated Aquent Talent who always makes it a priority to improve workflow and communications!
As the company Vice President you may have seen nearly passed out in a stall in the men's room at last night's company party, I hope you'll recognize that today we are both working toward a common goal (the good of the corporation) and will let bygones be bygones.
This means comments such as, "Nothing like a night on the tiles!" and "Vodka's better going in than coming out, isn't it?" will be unnecessary.
And that whatever went on in the hydrangea bushes is really my business and no one else's.
I had quite a bit of time to think while lying against that cold tile floor, and I was hoping to straighten out a few things this morning.
Though during our wonderful company celebration I may have told some of you (repeatedly) to call me "King Wassup!", I hope in the sobering light of day you will refer to me only by my given name so we can keep matters at a professional level.
You may not have known previously that I have a weakness to "shake my groove thing" every time I hear the song "Funky Town." Now that you do, I hope you will see fit to delete any photos or movies you have of me and a certain group of Administrative Assistants off your digital cameras.
I do not want to be seeing myself on YouTube.
I assure you, though I do feel it's important to get together with one's "compadres," loosen neckties, and down a few single malt scotches, I do not, as a rule, drink from a coworker's loafer while others yell, "All hail the King! All hail the King!"
I'd also like to note that while I am fond of ice cream, I do not usually smear it on my face and pretend to be an aboriginal Tasmanian, nor pull my trousers down just below my waistline to mock a current women's fashion statement for others' amusement.
If you heard me describe my morning commute as "The Daily Funeral Procession," I assure you that I enjoy my tenure here at Krupsberg, LLC. and I look forward to driving to this company for years to come.
Perhaps with the exception of this morning.
Even though I felt compelled to announce from the top of table 18 that left-handed persons are "godless commies," I actually believe no such thing. Nor do I deem anyone who plays our state lottery "a tree-swinging cretin," as I understand a good portion of that money goes to our children's education.
I'd like to clarify a few points made in the heat of the moment during last night's celebration: Burnt Sienna is not a crayon for pansies, Pat Sajak should not be strung up by his thumbs and beaten with 9-irons, and I do not believe hemp products are "wearable crack."
As curious a phenomenon as it may seem, I do not have any idea why I can recite all the words to "It's Raining Men," nor do I have confidence that I can do it again. So please don't ask for a repeat performance.
I trust you will recognize this morning I am not quite at the top of my game. Should I fall asleep during your meeting or presentation, I hope you would be so kind as to e-mail me the notes and wake me if I begin to snore.
I'm sure you will also be in agreement that it is neither effective nor productive to tell someone, "You look like hell," when they don't feel their best. If I could lie down on a couch all day with an ice pack on my head ala Nick and Nora Charles, it would give me great pleasure, but we've got a lot of work to do this week.
If you liberated me from the men's room middle stall, fished out my driver's license, and told the cab driver to deliver me safely home, I am truly in your debt.
I wish, however, you would have had the wherewithal to wipe off the newly inked "Long Live the King!" from my forehead before I arrived home to my recently awakened wife.
By the way, would the person responsible for putting permanent markers on each table during last night's event please see me in my office ASAP?
Thank you.
James W. Barrett Vice President of Operations __________________________________________________
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Huzzah, Aquent is hosting our first Creative Webcast!
For those of you who have been playing, we've had a few very well attended Marketing Webcasts and we didn't want all you creatives to be left out.
This one specifically addresses coordinating print and Web initiatives and is hosted by our own Nina Eigerman (President of Aquent Consulting), who has worked on just this issue with LL Bean, Staples, and Blue Cross
Blue Shield of North Carolina.
This was created for "Designers, leaders of creative
services departments, or creative management who recognize that the
most successfully executed campaigns seamlessly integrate both print
and Web."
Here's the pitch (in case you need to tell your boss why you need an hour alone):
Is your design team
aggravated by inconsistent messaging, duplication of effort, and
improper use of content across your print and web channels? Would you
like to find out how some major companies have solved this dilemma?
For most creative services organizations, coordinating print and Web initiatives is a challenge. Almost every company supports both
mediums as important components of their overall marketing strategy,
but few have effectively integrated their teams.... uncoordinated initiatives can lead to duplication of
efforts, higher costs, longer cycle times to develop content, and
extremely frustrated design teams.
You will learn how identify the key obstacles to coordination of
your print and Web initiatives as well as an approach which leverages
design planning technology and skills training to complete your print
and web projects on budget and with high-quality results in both
channels.
And you can tell your boss: It's absolutely FREE!
Well, I guess your time isn't free.
Unless you listen during your lunch hour. Early lunch hour.
It all happens Thursday, September 27th @ 10:00 AM
Eric B. - Web Project Manager | Producer Carrie W. - Graphic Design | Production Nicole S. - Presentation Specialist | Designer Sonya B. - Proofreader | Copy Editor __________________________________________________
Eric B. Web Project Manager | Producer
Former Web Producer at Whittman Hart Interactive (formerly DNA Studios), for the last two years Eric managed the on-line advertising and Web site activities on a host of top interactive accounts including Sony Pictures, Anheuser-Busch, Toyota, General Electric, Sea World, and United Talent Agency.
Most recently overseeing the entire Kellogg's account, he handled multiple project schedules and budgets (including estimations), selected freelance staff, served as the liaison between the both the clients' and his technical staff, managed client expectations, and (best of all) delivered projects on time and on budget.
Eric is expert at organizing and managing a crack team of creatives, Information Architects, Flash Designers, HTML Programmers, and ASP and Java Developers to produce stellar results.
Professional Categories: Web Project Management, Web Producer, Marketing Project Manager __________________________________________________
Carrie W. Graphic Design | Production
Over 7 years print and 4 years Web experience, Carrie's a talented Designer with excellent illustration skills and an even better attitude!
Freelancing over the last 7 years, she's designed and produced terrific looking print-ready brochures, packaging, pamphlets, and fliers for companies like EMI, AIG SunAmerica, KB Home, Architectural Digest, Nestle USA, and many, many more.
As a staff member Carrie has designed and produced magazines, books, newsletters, ads, posters, Web pages, one-sheets, and more for University of Southern California, Comp*ny, and the Ann Arbor Observer.
She has a great eye for detail and makes sure every project starts out right on the screen and ends up right on the press or Web!
Skills: Adobe InDesign, Microsoft Word, Adobe Photoshop, Adobe Illustrator, QuarkXPress, Adobe Acrobat, Flatbed Scanning, Macromedia Dreamweaver __________________________________________________
Nicole S. Presentation Specialist | Designer
An incredibly talented Presentation Designer, Nicole works wonders in Microsoft PowerPoint on Mac and PC. She also has the unique ability to work in Flash, Illustrator, and Photoshop and integrate the files seamlessly into stunning presentations.
Working with Aquent and on her own since 1997, her client roster includes Fox Kids, BBDO Advertising, ABC Family, Disney, and Leiberman Marketing Research. At Amgen, she was Team Leader, coordinating a staff of 6 Presentation Specialists and providing traffic for the company's hectic tradeshow schedule.
If you're looking for someone who can create logos, design backgrounds, maps, charts, tables, and incorporate videos/images for your presentations, tradeshows, and crucial client pitches, then you know who to call!
A stellar Proofreader and Copy Editor, Sonya's resume reads like a Who's Who list of advertising in Southern California.
She's proofread and edited for Terry Hines Advertising, DDB, 30Sixty Advertising, Deutsch LA, Team One Advertising, and Rubin/Postaer Advertising. A few of the many companies she's freelanced with include Teleflora, GTS Graphics, Herbalife, Film Festival Channel, Kaiser Permanente, and Healthcare Communications Group.
Her expertise includes ads, brochures, POP, tear sheets, DVD box covers, magazines, textbooks, and much more.
Just now available after a long-term assignment, she comes very highly recommended from us!
To: CEO's 60th Birthday Bash "Crew" From: James Avery, CEO
While I know it might seem uncommon to make requests for a birthday celebration that is still in its early planning stages, I was hoping you would take a moment to find below a short inventory of items I do not want to see at my upcoming birthday event.
Not that I find turning 60 years old a serious or somber occasion, but I have been hearing a number of "fun" ideas for this event in the hallways that have set my very hair on end.
Since many of my corporate peers will be in attendance (many of whom, I should remind you, are high ranking officers at well-respected companies), I am hoping that you are planning a tasteful, yet entertaining event.
I realize that the four of you have most likely been throwing around a number of themes for this party, which is perfectly acceptable, as I do want this event to be enjoyable for everyone invited. But I did want to reiterate this event should show a certain amount of refinement.
Which means themes like Rock 'n Roll, Hawaiian Luau, or Pirate Party should not be considered. (I have no idea who would throw a Pirate party, but I saw one pictured in a catalog recently, so I thought I'd better include it.) A Mardi Gras theme is also off-limits, primarily because I don't want inebriated staff members exposing themselves in exchange for tawdry plastic beads during this function.
I do not want a Roaring 20's Gangster party. We currently have enough issues with "gangsters" in this city, let's not encourage people to dress up and "party" like one.
I am also strongly opposed to any gambling/Vegas themed party. If you have spoken to HR, you are already aware (mostly because those people in HR cannot keep their mouths shut) that a number of people in this company have had previous problems with gambling. Knowing that an ex-gambler might relapse while trying to win enough chips to buy an oversized stuffed Tweety Bird then consequently leave their family penniless is not a risk I'm willing to take.
I do not want a Retro 60's party. Many members of this company's Board of Directors were conservative in 1969 and are still conservative now. Subjecting them to wearing beads, fringe jackets, and "Peace Now!" buttons would be like forcing Ann Coulter to dress up like a member of the Village People.
There are also a number of items I do not want set out on guests' tables. To begin with, I do not want any item that glows in the dark or makes noise of any kind. I am going to give a twenty-minute speech during the event, so it's going to be difficult enough to obtain guests' attention (especially two hours into an open bar), so I do not need to hear the sound of a metallic kazoo playing "I Did it My Way" while I am trying to speak.
For this same reason I do not want anything on the tables which can be hurled, flown, launched, or flung at me.
I do not want to see inflatable footballs, fish decorations, festive straws, themed toothpicks, tiny containers of bubbles, wacky hats, or anything to do with a cowboy or a safari.
I don't want plates, napkins, and cheap plastic cups which inform everyone I am "Over the Hill" nor do I want to see a headstone with my name on it.
I do not want to see my guests scrambling on the floor for discount candy falling out of a piñata.
I do not intend to be blindfolded during any part of this event.
I do not want to see goody bags or disposable cameras on guest's tables.
I do not want to do the Macarena, the Electric Slide, or the Limbo.
I hope it is not asking too much that you please refrain from any use of confetti, streamers, and/or balloons on this occasion.
Most of all, I hope this memo helps clear up any questions you may have had about my tastes and preferences.
I realize the four of you have quite a bit of work to do, so I won't keep you further.
I do want to thank each of you for accepting your appointment to be on this event committee.
H O T T A L E N T The Newsletter of Aquent's Available Talent
A U G U S T | 2 9 | 2 0 0 7 __________________________________________________
IN THIS ISSUE:
Hot Talent
Featured Talent This Week
That Bit at the End - "A Metric Ton of Prevention"
Subscribe | Unsubscribe Information __________________________________________________
HOT TALENT
The Hot Talent Newsletter has been due for a makeover. So after much discussion, we've decided a mascot would really give this publication the panache it deserves.
In just a few weeks you will find our new Aquent Newsletter mascot "Hottie" simply everywhere!
On the streets you'll be saying things like, "I really dig that Hottie!" and "Boy that Hottie really sells the Aquent brand!"
On second thought, maybe we should reconvene with our naming committee.
While we do, have a look at these exceptional Aquent Talent available right now!
Just follow the links for profiles, samples, and resumes.
Is it Hottie in here? __________________________________________________
FEATURED TALENT THIS WEEK
Tori R. - Flash Developer Yvette Y. - Designer Laura R. - Proofreader David S. - Assistant Brand Manager __________________________________________________
Tori R. Flash Developer
A superstar Flash Developer with over 7 years of experience in Web site and Flash development, Tori hammered through our extraordinarily detailed Advanced Flash ActionScript assessment and scored 5 out of 5 possible points!
Something we rarely, if ever, see.
With strong PHP and ASP (as well as meticulous hand coding) skills, he loves mastering new tools and meeting challenges. Recently he developed a Flash shopping cart that functioned alongside OS Commerce using PHP for an e-commerce site (we told you he loves challenges). He's well able to develop full Flash sites from the ground up, develop templates, and produce and design interactive CDs in a multitude of formats.
Currently looking for a place to "call home", we're sure there will be no shortage of companies that would love to have him on board.
Skills: Macromedia Flash, ASP, Adobe After Effects, Adobe Illustrator, Adobe Photoshop, JavaScript, Macromedia Dreamweaver, Macromedia Fireworks, Microsoft Windows, Microsoft Windows NT __________________________________________________
Yvette Y. Designer
Working with both our Los Angeles and Sydney Aquent offices, Yvette is a terrifically talented print designer with a wonderful personality to boot.
With a portfolio chock full of work including ads, brochures, logos, packaging, newsletters, banners, and identities, her satisfied client roster includes companies in the financial, sports and recreation, entertainment, tourism, non-profit, and hospitality industries (including Australia's largest financial planning institute and DIRECTV).
With a background in media, marketing, and graphics coordination, she's a pro at planning, budgeting, and making sure each project is well executed, from concept to stunning completion.
Skills: Adobe Photoshop, Adobe InDesign, QuarkXPress, Adobe Illustrator, Microsoft Excel, Microsoft Office, Microsoft PowerPoint, Microsoft Word, Outlook Express, __________________________________________________
Laura R. Proofreader
A meticulous Proofreader with a broad range of experience in advertising, medical, publishing, and finance, Laura raises proofreading standards to new heights wherever she goes.
Most recently contracting at biotech giant Amgen, she quickly gained a reputation for incredibly accurate work, an excellent command of the written language, and a comprehensive knowledge of typography. She wrote the supplement to the Amgen Style Guide, which became the in-house reference for training new Proofreaders.
She's proofread everything from brochures and large Web sites to annual reports to textbooks for companies like IBM, McGraw-Hill, Union 76, Warner Bros. and Virgin Records, Mattel, and Saatchi & Saatchi. Her collateral experience includes copyediting, copywriting, and production supervision. Her dedication to her craft is truly exceptional.
If it absolutely needs to be error free, call us about Laura!
Professional Categories: Copywriting, Editing, Proofreading __________________________________________________
David S. Assistant Brand Manager
A long time freelancer at Disney Marketing and his MBA from Pepperdine, David was most recently Assistant Brand Managing at Buena Vista Home Entertainment handling budgets, tie-ins, and relationship management for a number of film properties.
As Marketing Coordinator for both Buena Vista International Marketing and Walt Disney Records, he helped synergize key partnership relations between Radio Disney, Mattel, McDonald's, and Burger King restaurants and managed third party fulfillment vendors for unbelievably high volumes of premium products subject to critical time constraints.
Looking to continue his notable work in brand management "to infinity and beyond", consider David for your next exceptional marketing opportunity!
Skills: HTML, Lotus Freelance Graphics, Management, Microsoft Excel, Microsoft PowerPoint, Microsoft Word, Outlook Express, Real Video, SAP __________________________________________________
THAT BIT AT THE END "A Metric Ton of Prevention"
As a representative for our Company's new Precautionary Oversight Committee, I would like to take a moment to introduce myself and outline some new and exciting changes taking place in the coming weeks.
After John Hank's now infamous "Running with Scissors" episode earlier this month, our President and CEO immediately sprung into action and decided to help make our workplace safer for the good of the company. Both Robert C. Stanwick and myself were appointed to the newly formed Precautionary Oversight Committee the following day, based on our "outstanding records of workdays without an accident" (neither of us has sustained even a paper cut since becoming staff members).
Many of you may already know me as "that busy lady who does something in Finance," but you may not be aware I am also the mother of 7 who keeps her household running as safely as any scientific laboratory you could imagine. I haven't been to an emergency room in 5 years (and then only due to my husband's negligence). We at the Hartshorne household live by mottos: "Stow It, Don't Throw It", "A Hot Pot is a Not Pot", and "Think! And Go Slower with the Mower". These aren't just embedded in our children's minds, but posted throughout our house, garage, and front lawn. Those "Employees Must Wash Hands Before Returning to Work" placards aren't cheap, but can be a lifesaver when prominently displayed in your family's bathrooms.
Robert Stanwick, by his very disposition, is an infinitely careful person. Allergic to nearly every item created by both man and nature, he wouldn't dare think of picking up another person's coffee mug without seeing the lab results first. If you wonder why Robert looks so young, that's because he understands the sun is our skin's enemy and wouldn't dream of leaving the office without a long protective coat, hat, sunglasses, and surgical mask. Bravo, Robert!
Now that we've all settled into the comfort that 24 Accident Free Days brings, Robert and I would like to remind each and every one of you to keep a watchful eye for potential workplace hazards. It's your duty to protect yourself and your coworkers by MAKING EVERY DAY A SAFETY DAY.
Though our office is free of forklifts and heavy machinery of any kind, let's not all fall into a lull about the true dangers that lie in wait around every corner of this office. So we’ve compiled a fairly comprehensive list of current "Clear and Present Dangers SOLVED!" within our office and the next steps for improvement. Here are a few (the rest will be posted on the Intranet, once we find out who has User Name and Password to make changes). CORDS SHORTENED ON ALL PHONES Have you ever thought about the strain put on your neck by placing your handset between your head and shoulder? Or the obvious dangers of a tangled phone cord? If these thoughts were keeping you up at night (Robert and I have lost a lot of sleep!), worry no longer. All phone cords will now be 3 and 1/4 inches long.
EMERGENCY EXITS UNLOCKED/ LOCATED We are finally rectifying this unfortunate situation caused by our last CFO, who believed staff members would use emergency exits to sneak out and smoke if they had the chance. Come Monday a number of you will find emergency exit doors where filing cabinets once stood. It took some doing, but good detective work with our office's blueprints helped revealed all their locations.
REMOVAL OF URINAL DEODORIZERS Often called "urinal mints" we needed to make sure every child who enters our men's restroom doesn't stop for candy and wind up in the hospital.
BUDDY SYSTEM FOR REPLACING LASER TONER CARTRIDGES You may not know it, but over 4 American DEATHS in 2006 were caused by ties catching in laser printers. While hiccups killed more people in the US during same time period, we'd still rather not take any chances. Diagrams detailing how your "buddy" should hold your tie during toner replacement (without violating any of Human Resources' policies) will be located above each and every laser printer in the office.
On September 1st you'll be seeing some easy-to-read, easier-to-understand signs popping up everywhere like: "No Biohazards in Staff Fridge!", "Be Careful, This Machine Has No Brain, Use Your Own", and "Report Your Drunk Coworker".
In fact you'll get to know our new mascot, "Mr. Ouch" quite well. You may recognize him from signs where he is being electrocuted by a transformer, hit over the head by an automated gate, or being stung repeatedly by a Portuguese Man-o-War.
Of course we wouldn't dare consider ourselves a safe workplace without placing bright green signs everywhere that inform you, "This office has worked ___ days without a lost time accident. The best previous record was ___ days." We say, let's do our best to help make a new record!
We have so much more in store for you during the next few weeks.
It'll be a veritable Celebration of Safety! Except, of course, without the balloons (latex, strangulation from strings), salty snacks (choking hazard, high sodium content), and hanging decorations (eye injury).
Robert and I are extremely excited to be on our company's Precautionary Oversight Committee and are looking forward to making 2007 our safest year ever!
In the meantime, we'll enjoy seeing you at the yearly company BBQ at the lake. We know you're going to love the changes our team made!
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