With the sale of full-sized Sport-Utility Vehicles sharply slumping in recent years and fear of an upcoming recession, we've decided to help boost SUV sales nationwide and help give the American economy a shot in the arm.
The idea came to us after receiving a curious chain letter about a "Kitchen Towel Exchange".
The idea is amazingly simple, just send off a few towels to friends and receive a whole bunch more!
Wow, we thought, if we just wrote a similar letter, replacing a small ticket item like a kitchen towel with a bigger ticket item like a Brand New Full-Sized Sport-Utility Vehicle, then sent it to everyone we knew, we'd be doing the American public a huge favor!
Cool, huh?
Just take a look at the revised letter with our new text IN CAPS.
And then feel free to print out and play a part in helping out America!
---------------
Dear FELLOW INTERESTED AMERICAN
This is a BRAND NEW FULL-SIZED SPORT-UTILITY VEHICLE exchange!
Please send a BRAND NEW FULL-SIZED SPORT-UTILITY VEHICLE to the person whose name is listed in the #1 spot below. Then move my name to the #1 position and put your name in the #2 position. Only your name and my name should appear when you send your letters out. Send this to six friends.
This is not a chain letter! It's just for fun AND AN ECONOMIC BOOST. If you cannot do this within 5 days, please let me know so it will be fair to those participating.
A LARGE CRATE should enclose the BRAND NEW FULL-SIZED SPORT-UTILITY VEHICLE nicely. As a result, you should receive 36 BRAND NEW FULL-SIZED SPORT-UTILITY VEHICLES for the price of one!
It's honestly fun to see the different locations from which the BRAND NEW FULL-SIZED SPORT-UTILITY VEHICLES arrive.
Seldom does anyone drop out because we can all use the BRAND NEW FULL-SIZED SPORT-UTILITY VEHICLES, right?
The turnaround is extremely fast because there are only two names on the list. You should be receiving your BRAND NEW FULL-SIZED SPORT-UTILITY VEHICLES within two weeks.
Don't be the one responsible for spoiling the fun OR OUR NATION'S ECONOMY and stopping the parade of BRAND NEW FULL-SIZED SPORT-UTILITY VEHICLES!
Remember to please contact me AND BEN S. BERNANKE, CURRENT CHAIRMAN OF THE FED if you don't want to join the good times AND THE FINANCIAL REVITALIZATION OF YOUR OWN COUNTRY'S ECONOMY.
Please make sure to send a new item and not YOUR CRAPPY OLD SPORT-UTILITY VEHICLE, as this will defeat the purpose OF THIS IMPORTANT FINANCIAL UNDERTAKING.
Thank you AND LET'S GET CRACKING, AMERICA!!!
Name #1
__________________________________
Name #2
__________________________________
The idea came to us after receiving a curious chain letter about a "Kitchen Towel Exchange".
The idea is amazingly simple, just send off a few towels to friends and receive a whole bunch more!
Wow, we thought, if we just wrote a similar letter, replacing a small ticket item like a kitchen towel with a bigger ticket item like a Brand New Full-Sized Sport-Utility Vehicle, then sent it to everyone we knew, we'd be doing the American public a huge favor!
Cool, huh?
Just take a look at the revised letter with our new text IN CAPS.
And then feel free to print out and play a part in helping out America!
---------------
Dear FELLOW INTERESTED AMERICAN
This is a BRAND NEW FULL-SIZED SPORT-UTILITY VEHICLE exchange!
Please send a BRAND NEW FULL-SIZED SPORT-UTILITY VEHICLE to the person whose name is listed in the #1 spot below. Then move my name to the #1 position and put your name in the #2 position. Only your name and my name should appear when you send your letters out. Send this to six friends.
This is not a chain letter! It's just for fun AND AN ECONOMIC BOOST. If you cannot do this within 5 days, please let me know so it will be fair to those participating.
A LARGE CRATE should enclose the BRAND NEW FULL-SIZED SPORT-UTILITY VEHICLE nicely. As a result, you should receive 36 BRAND NEW FULL-SIZED SPORT-UTILITY VEHICLES for the price of one!
It's honestly fun to see the different locations from which the BRAND NEW FULL-SIZED SPORT-UTILITY VEHICLES arrive.
Seldom does anyone drop out because we can all use the BRAND NEW FULL-SIZED SPORT-UTILITY VEHICLES, right?
The turnaround is extremely fast because there are only two names on the list. You should be receiving your BRAND NEW FULL-SIZED SPORT-UTILITY VEHICLES within two weeks.
Don't be the one responsible for spoiling the fun OR OUR NATION'S ECONOMY and stopping the parade of BRAND NEW FULL-SIZED SPORT-UTILITY VEHICLES!
Remember to please contact me AND BEN S. BERNANKE, CURRENT CHAIRMAN OF THE FED if you don't want to join the good times AND THE FINANCIAL REVITALIZATION OF YOUR OWN COUNTRY'S ECONOMY.
Please make sure to send a new item and not YOUR CRAPPY OLD SPORT-UTILITY VEHICLE, as this will defeat the purpose OF THIS IMPORTANT FINANCIAL UNDERTAKING.
Thank you AND LET'S GET CRACKING, AMERICA!!!
Name #1
__________________________________
Name #2
__________________________________
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