Now at your local toy store, the new action figure collection that's sweeping the country like a prairie wildfire...
Introducing the ECO-WARRIORS**!
Out to save the Virgin Territories from the notorious Land Baron and his malevolent Henchmen, the Eco-Warriors band together to stop his evil empire before it's too late.
Collect all five action new figures and help save the Earth!
LAND BARON
He's out to trash the Eco-Warriors' plans and lay waste to the Virgin Territories!
His master plan: pave over the pristine wilderness and fill it full of mini-malls jam-packed with coffee shops, mobile phone stores, nail salons, and shady dental practices. A ruthless egomaniac, he and his evil hooligans will stop at nothing in their bid for domination.
The Land Baron action figure comes complete with evil laugh, blueprints for Wal-Mart, and gas-guzzling Hummer.
(15 gallons of gas to get Hummer to the next mall sold separately.)
THE FREE RANGER
The ultimate masked avenger, the Free Ranger rides in on his trusty steed Wilma emancipating chickens, cows, pigs, and occasional African pygmy goat from the Land Baron's Factory Farms.
One of six Texas Rangers ambushed and left for dead by malicious henchmen, Free Ranger survived only with the help of a kindly brood of hens who nursed him back to health in their stuffy coop.
Sworn to liberate every last animal in the Virgin Territories, the Free Ranger has dedicated his life not only to making the West a great place to roam, but also a terrific spot to get a nice vegan meatloaf sandwich.
THE SCAVENGER
Discarded by his parents due to his raccoon-like appearance and appetite, Scavenger keeps his vow to let no potentially recyclable item escape through his tiny, black claws.
Residents of Mini Mall City better look out before they toss their bottle or can into the garbage, Scavenger may be right inside and ready to launch it right back in their face!
Arriving on the scene in his biodiesel-powered shopping cart, even the strongest of aluminum cans is no match for his incredible strength. Able to penetrate the darkest night with his night-vision and super hearing, no foe can hide from him!
The Scavenger comes complete with rocket bottle launcher, headphones, and extra wheel for shopping cart.
THE COMPOSTER
Nary a fallen leaf or twig goes to waste when The Composter shows up.
Ready to bring a swift end to the tossing of yard trimmings into trash bins by Baron's no-good Henchmen, he uses his karate chop action and nunchaku/bypass loppers to send these evildoers right back where they came from!
Armed with the benefits of anaerobic decomposition and a poor sense of smell, he's ready to vanquish yard litter and closed minds!
HYBRID VEHICLE MAN
Outfitted with one gallon of gas and heated leather seats, he's ready hop into his hybrid, drive sixty miles, and duke it out with Land Baron!
Pull his string and he'll tell you (for hours on end) about carbon emissions, global warming, and the demise of the electric vehicle.
Action figure includes sidearm and Road Atlas. Hybrid Vehicle comes with intermittent windshield wiper/rocket launcher, hot cup/grenade holder, low-rolling resistance tires, and low, low 1.5% APR financing.
"Take that, gas guzzler!"
TREE SITTER
Elementary school teacher by day and superhero after hours, mild-mannered Nicole Porter slips into her woolen suit by the light of the moon and magically transforms herself into the dazzling Tree Sitter!
Taking her rightful place among the tallest redwoods, she vigilantly sits and watches out for the Evil Land Baron.
And sits.
And sits.
Comes complete with tree platform, comfortable chair, and a really, really long novel.
PROFESSOR CHIMPSKY
Nature or Nurture? Why Nature of course!
Tucked away in his top-secret Eco-Lab (sold separately) Professor Chimpsky spends his days and nights creating formulas from his rare collection of rainforest plants to help the Eco-Warriors win the battle for the Virgin Territories!
The Professor comes fully equipped with test tube, Petri dish, and soon-to-be-FDA-approved drugs.
Watson and Crick have nothing on him!
The ECO-WARRIORS...
Collect 'em all!!!
**Each authentic Eco-Warrior action figure created individually from injected plastic resin.
*Made in China.
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